What to do to complain less and better?
Saverio Tomasella: Concretely, the Calimeros can attempt to replace the complaint with the very factual, descriptive expression of an event or feeling, rather than generally feeling sorry for themselves. For example instead of saying, "It's always on me that it falls", explain his problem, "today, I went to the distributor to withdraw money. The device swallowed my card. I am furious, I have no means of payment. This avoids the vague amalgamation of self-pity. Then we expose others to the problem very clearly. In this case, they may feel concerned and offer their help. When we groan in a general way, no one can offer us a concrete solution.
How can I help a loved one who complains all the time?
Saverio Tomasella: The first thing you can do with a plaintive relative is to take the time to listen to him by asking questions to understand what is wrong. Sometimes, when it is truly respected and renewed, this step may be enough. Yet, in some cases, it may be necessary to tell the other, "I'm doing what I can, I can not do more, I can listen to you, make efforts." Now it's up to you to find solutions to these problems. " The limit placed puts the plaintive face to himself, showing him that he can not immediately pour his discontent on one person. This stop is important and often bears fruit. Either the Calimero complains to someone else, or he understands that a therapy or, at least, a change is needed.
==> To read: Challenge: we stop moaning!
Stop pestering, complaining, grumbling for 21 consecutive days ... Christine Lewicki, a company coach, challenged her the day she realized she was losing a lot of time, - as many of us by the way -, to moan ... about his three children, his work, his computer, in his car ... And that it poisoned his existence. His challenge, successful, changed his life. She tells.